How things just might be.

Until the unity is threatened by
Those who have and who have not –
Those who are with and those who are without
And dangle jobs like a donkey’s carrot –
Until you don’t know where you are

Are you gonna realize
The class war’s real and not mythologized

-The Style Council. “Walls Come Tumbling Down”.

Employment Agencies or “Recruiters” are irritating me lately. They give me hope. They take it away. They disappear. Was the hope ever real? Have I been a part of some quota that needed to be filled? It’s vexing to be so cynical but lately I feel like I’m nothing more than a number. I wonder how many others there are just like me who pore through a myriad of computer-generated “leads” every night and diligently fill out every form. Upload your resume and the software automatically populates the application. Usually incorrectly. You have to go through and correct the mistakes. And even then, you STILL have to enter all the employment information on another page. Over and over. Every night. And so it goes. And so it goes.

Every call I get is from someone who’s really friendly. Sometimes I am asked to go in and interview at the agency, which is usually around the RBC Center in Raleigh. The interviews leave me feeling hopeful. Like they went through a hundred resumes and thought mine was one of the few that were worthy of further examination. Sometimes I swear a job, a perfect job is so close that I can’t help but plan for life after being hired. What will I buy? When will I be able to record a new CD? What bills can we pay? In that order.

So close. So far away. No success as of yet. All I want to do is use my given gifts.

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