A facile epiphany.

On stardom:

Most people, from the time they are born until the time they die, when it comes to things that really matter, hear the word “no” more often than not. So we are conditioned to be able to facilitate, in our way, the negative responses, like a kind of callus. “No”, you don’t get the job, the girl, the raise, the winning ticket, the candy, the praise, the approval, the friendship.

However, when one becomes famous for whatever reason, for that brief explosion onto the public consciousness,  the default answer becomes “yes”. And I just don’t think people can handle that answer all the time. Or maybe at all. Look what happens to people in the news who are told “yes”, you can have the place in line, the free merch, the role, the sex, the food, the drinks…they more often than not become twisted in one way or another. Some get used to it, but many do not. I just don’t think most people can handle all that “yes”.

I, myself, get “no” about 5 times a day when I’m applying for work.

You know who says “yes” to us? Children and dogs and people to whom we give money. And true friends, but they are sick like us.I still fear “no” from my friends to the point where hearing “yes” from them gives me a slight discomfort. When I was growing up, hearing “no” from a girl was what I was used to to the point where hearing “yes” made me question THEM! And since being told “yes” was such a strange thing, it made me/makes me slightly uncomfortable, to be honest.

Sometimes I meet the day thinking “I’m going to say ‘yes’ to everything that comes along.” However, it’s difficult for people to accept my “yes” because they tend to not trust the fact that all I’m doing is saying “yes” and not wanting something in return. It’s easy for “no” to be the answer and then have to guess why “no” presents itself, but it’s none of your business why “no” is the default setting in whichever instance it appears.

I think Jim Morrison, Keith Moon, Kurt Cobain and all the starlets and stars racing toward the hanging tree heard “yes” so many times that it became meaningless. And when “yes” loses its potency, what else is there?

Would you agree?

3 thoughts on “A facile epiphany.

  1. Chris says:

    Agreed. (I will avoid saying, “yes” so that you may keep your comfort.)

  2. Debi Wagner says:

    Amen!

  3. Aw, Chris and Debi are too smart.

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