Bumper Stickers.

Why, if you think about, do you have bumper stickers on your car? I was forced to buy a new car a month ago after Cletus gave me the ol’ “what fer” regarding my 2002 Saturn Vue’s incessant whining and thumping. It might make it to work. Might not. Might last a month. Might not. Gon’ cost ya. How much? Hard to say. Don’t rightly know.

Desperate is no way to walk into a dealership. But desperate was I. And I came out of the fracas with a shiny new Ford Fiesta. YES, foor the hundredth fucking time, they STILL make them. Or  should I say they “again” make them. Whatever.

Last time, flush from a 2008 victory by me ‘n’ Barack, I had one of those “We did it” bumper stickers sent to me, and I placed it proudly on the right ass of my black mariah. He looked more like a pensive robot than anything else, but still, it was my first political adornment of the vehicular variety.

This fucker was hard to remove, after my disillusionment at his failed drug war policies and continued surveillance acquiescence. But it wasn’t worth it after a while, and besides, I still like the guy.

The thing is, what was I trying to say? And to whom? Why would anyone behind me care about my political leanings? Was I gonna change anyone’s mind? If Hitch couldn’t do it, I sure as hell wasn’t going to. So why bother? Do you have bumper stickers on your car? Why? When I see a stick-figure family, I think “abduction”. I don’t know why. But the one that really makes me cringe is this one:

Why? Is someone behind you going to curb their seething hatred based on a number of fictional characters based on having to sit behind your fumes? Seriously, not to be glib, but what are you thinking? Are you smug about showing off to the world that you do, in fact, want people to not take up arms based on some crazy book? NO ONE wants that. The others want you to lay down and renounce. Violence being a messy byproduct of non-assent. But I just wonder if you think you’re going to change someone’s mind. I guess I’m as bad as anyone, having been caught up in the sweet zeitgeist of 2008, so maybe I should just shut up.

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14 thoughts on “Bumper Stickers.

  1. rhijulbec says:

    Being ever the modest Canuck, I don’t broadcast my political leanings (truth be told on any given day I can fly between Conservative, Liberal and New Dem in one sentence!) so haven’t any stickers on my 20 year old Aerostar. The one above, the cutesy putesy *coexist* leaves me out completely I fear. Being Atheist does have its perks!

    • As if someone could be convinced by the behind of some stranger’s car to change their mind if they were dead set against it. “Gosh, that bumper sticker makes a good case…maybe I should rethink this….”

      • rhijulbec says:

        For sure…I always had an almost overwhelming desire to ram cars with those “baby on board” damn bumper stickers. What, you’re kid on board means you’re impervious to accidents? Never sure why people had them. I have to admit I am a surly, ill tempered, brass balled bitch when I drive. Foulest temper this side of the Rockies when I’m behind the wheel!

      • The Calvin peeing on a frigging ford logo…how many steps was that process?? And not to be insensitive but the memorials on the rear windshield….the only excuse I could see would be advertising a business.

      • rhijulbec says:

        Watterson tried to sue them out of existence but finally gave up. I was disgusted by the very idea that anyone, anyone at all who really understood C&H would use his image for that purpose.

      • rhijulbec says:

        PS: how are you doing? No antidepressants and the death of your sister…not being nosey, just hope you are doing okay.

  2. Thank you for asking. I weened unsuccessfully. I was sitting in the pick-up line at their school when two things hit at once. A panic attack and pulsilate tinnitus. I blogged about that I think. They happened at the same moment. It was a sign, I think. All better in a month but I’m back on it, half-dose. Just to take the edge off. My sister still in my memory and heart but I think some people are put off by my pragmatism and realistic point of view.
    You?
    Er…vous?

  3. rhijulbec says:

    SSDD-Same Shit Different Day here. After the nightmare that was Cymbalta, I am now taking mirtazapine. I’m pretty much meh most days. With spring comes rain and with rain comes migraines and I’ve had this one for two solid weeks. I’m grumpy, fed up and about at the end of my tether. None of this is good is it? I must laugh at myself and what a sad sack I am. I am pleased you are tending to the depression before it becomes too acute. Its exactly your pragmatism and realism that caught my eye in the first place. Its refreshing, its readable, erudite, at once angry with a soupçon of humour. What’s not to enjoy?

    • I’d say the word “soupçon”. Did I know about migraines? Thank you for your kind words. Good to know you get it. Want a cd? Or twelve?

      • rhijulbec says:

        I do get it. The “round table” had in its midst some of the grouchiest, most opinionated and curmudgeonly booze pots ever and my favourite…Dorothy Parker took the rum cake for me. I love acerbic humour, of the sort that kind of makes your teeth grind a little and you hide your great guffaw behind your hand so no one will know how twisted you are that you found THAT kind of humour hysterical! Not sure if you knew about migraines. I know I’ve mentioned diabetes and fibromyalgia, perhaps not the fucking headaches. Cannot be said any other way I fear. Without voices like ours all there would be on the internet are cat videos (I admit to a weakness) and the hippie dippie “touch the earth and feel the sky” crap. Yuck!

      • rhijulbec says:

        I’m for every kind of music, I try to be anyway but “country”? Just cannot abide the stuff…oh jeez, you don’t play country do you? Shit, sorry. Again with the mouth in motion before the brain’s in gear. I would very much like to hear some of your music. If I like it we’ll talk shipping.

    • rhijulbec says:

      As I am finding evermore the case, spotify.com is not available here in The Great White (and way, way behind the times in technology because I cannot get hulu.com either, damnit!) North!!! I’m sorry I can’t listen to your music at that site. Any other way to have a listen AND do so here, where the cold wind of the CRTC blows?

  4. Go to Gilbertneal.com and/or http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default.cfm?bandID=1293581

    If these don’t work, iTunes. If not, not.
    Thank you.

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